Things Jasper Hale is not allowed to do

lol, nice!

381. Jasper Hale is not allowed to start speaking only in Latin so that Alice needs to spend all her time translating instead of shopping.

Haha, I wonder if that would work?

382. Jasper is not allowed to follow a woman who is wearing skimpy clothing around a bar while singing the Badonkadonk song.

haha, i love that song!!! lol

383. Jasper is not allowed to steal Alice's iPod and download a butt load of Britney Spears songs onto.

I say this because she would memorize the songs and sing them all the time....*shudder* scary.

Scary indeed!

384. Jasper is not allowed to ruin and break all of Alice's stuff and try to cover it up by saying that a wild animal got loose inside the house and did it.

385. Jasper is not allowed to tell Rosalie that her prized glass sculpture of her self got broken because the people in his head telled him to do it. (i'm not sure if she has one, but she might. *shrug* lol)

386. Jasper is not allowed to start bawling when Bella and Edward say "I do"

387. Jasper Hale is not allowed to spend the entire wedding oogling Angela instead of watching bella and edward.

388. Jasper is not allowed to get ontop of tables and start dancing and stripping, while singing some really bad love song while he's at Bella and Edward's reception.

Haha

388. Jasper Hale is not allowed to wear nothing but a speedo to the wedding.

389. Jasper Hale is not allowed to dispose of Edward and be his stand in for the wedding.

Haha

390. Jasper Hale is not allowed to start coughing when the when the "speak now or forever hold you peace" part comes

lol

391. Jasper Hale is not allowed to stand up and vehemently declaim in sanskrit when the "speak not or forever hold your peace" part comes.

Haha

392. Jasper Hale is not allowed to get trashed at the reception

393. Jasper Hale is not allowed to start singing obscene Welsh bar songs as they kiss.

lol

394. Jasper is not allowed to dress in drag and try to sneak into Bella's bachelorette party with a camera.

395. Jasper Hale is not allowed to hire a stripper for Edward's bachelor party.

and why the heck not? lol

396. Jasper Hale is not allowed to tell people that he is Peter Pan.

And that Alice is Tinkerbell?

397. Jasper is not allowed to put a pair of women's underwear all over Edward's room, to try and get Bella mad at Edward.

that's good for me. lol

398. Jasper is not allowed to say, "If someone hit your peter with a pan, you'd fly too!"

hehe, nice!

399. Jasper is not allowed to sing the song "anything you can do i can do better" to alice.

Nice.

Back on the subject of stripping at parties.. lol.

400. Jasper is not allowed to be one of the strippers at Bella's bachelorette party.

you think it would make her ditch edward?

401. Jasper is not allowed to hook up with rose while alice and bella are in italy, and defend himself as having been "romantically starved" without alice.

402. Jasper is not allowed to secretly hire a stripper for Bella's bachlorette party
(dont you dare get me started on the Jasper being a stripper thing!)

Anne, if I were Bella and Jasper stripped for me I'd be like Edward who?

Haha Ava

403. Jasper is not allowed to buy one of those mail order brides that resembles Alice, to use as a substitute for when Alice is away.

haha

404. Jasper is not allowed to make a cardboard cut-out of Alice so that when she's gone, she's still there.